I was looking back the past couple of weeks and came to the conclusion I didn't get ANYTHING done in that time. Days seem to fly by and time rushes through every occasion. Then I started to pay more attention to how I was going about my days. Waking up at 9h30, seawall until around 10h30 or 11h, then lunch with May, then back home around 3 or 4 and... nothing. Wasting time on facebook or watching irrelevant stuff on Netflix up until 1am when I decide it's late and time to go to bed.

As of this week I'm starting my new personal schedule. It starts with going to bed at 11pm at the most, so I can get proper 8 hours of sleep and get up healthy at 7am. Then seawall, two laps, back home around 8h30-9h. Then I can read something decent instead of pointless websurfing and meet May for lunch. After getting home, working on something. Writing, compositing, whatever, and then some more reading or maybe watching something but, if so, not for longer than one hour.

It's about time to learn Python. Why? Machine learning consultancy experts expect this trend to continue with increasing development in the Python ecosystem. And while your journey to learn Python programming may be just beginning, it’s nice to know that employment opportunities are abundant as well and maybe get back at that Harmonica I mentioned several posts ago - not even sure if I did it in English. That's it. I already failed miserably on Monday, by not being able to get out of bed at 7, nor 8, but only at 9. I succeeded at sleeping at 11pm, though, and read an entire book during the evening. Today I managed to wake up at 8am and hit the seawall in time. Then home, lunch, home again and some cleanup I need to get done in the next few days.

I had the weirdest dream tonight, by the way. Struggling against a stupid old computer that refused to obey even my most basic commands. Woke up angry about it, jeez.

This is a subject that has been at the back of my head ever since I created my Instagram account and exploded during last week, while I posted my demo reel there. Then it bounced back with a thousand thoughts about what I write up here and the several times I considered turning this blog into strictly "work", or "what will they think of me if they read this and that post?".

Soon after arriving in Vancouver I thought of going full-english here. Then I held back, it was a strange time and I wasn't confident enough on my own to fend off anyone who thought this whole blog thing was ridiculous and 15-year-oldish. Guess what, yeah, it started around that time (more towards 18, actually), but to keep on writing constantly for eight years now took a lot more effort than just telling what happened on each day. Some posts here literally speak for me and reading them back after some time makes me understand myself a lot better - and usually think how life was simple back then.

At VFS we have several classes that talk about digital footprints. It's important to be the first result when googling your name, it's important to not have embarrassing photos, it's important to look professional, do you know what an employer will think when reading that?, I haven't hired someone because of this and that, and so on. When I google my name, going ten pages down everything still points back to posts here, or videos I worked on, so, yeah, googling me will give anyone A LOT of information about me. Do I worry about it?

If whatever content linked to my name made its way online, there's a great chance that I'm aware of it. I do post a lot of "professional", "workey" stuff about lenses, reviews, tests, my process and all, but I also have very personal posts up. Crap, it seems like I'm going in circles not finding how to really hit my point here.

I guess the problem start when someone says "they might not hire you because of this". I have some serious issues regarding restricting information online, specially information that I WROTE MYSELF, ABOUT ME. I get the game where everyone pretends to be cool and to know everything but I think that's utter crap. Why is that? Because when you hire someone or consider someone for a job, we're talking not about a machine but about a fucking human being and, as much as any other human, we all have quirks and problems, usually balanced with something for a good side.

Sure I could've tried going through my year faking all along that everything was fine and never said a word about it but, you know, people connect much more when we're down on the dirt together. I cannot translate the amount of replies and people sharing their own sad stories when I wrote a post that will eventually get me OUT of a job interview - "no way I want this nut working here!". The reason why that happens is because suddenly you're not just some guy sitting at a chair in a dark studio. You're a real person just like you reading this, with just the same amount - and even the same type - of problems, and that's the main reason I never gave up on writing this blog, not even when I had like 3-4 visitors a day.

Sorry guys, but the reason I write here is not for your entertainment - sure, sometimes it is, but it's as much fun for me as it's for you -, the reason I keep on writing is because I HAVE to. I'm not too keen on talking, not even to my closest friends and this blog is sort of a public journal for anyone who wants an insight of what I am. Along the way I work on applying a few lessons I learned from my parents such as never bringing anyone down and avoiding giving up my full address!

Also, another reason for keep on writing is so I don't get so full of myself and start to think I'm better than anyone! I'm always open to new conversations, helping anyone I can with questions - cameras, lenses, anamorphic, compositing, bring it on! - talk about the hard times in life, asking for help and such.

Back to Instagram and posting my reel. The moment I started posting I had 588 followers. By the time I finished posting the 5 clips (less than ten minutes later), that number had dropped to 580, meaning that eight people were absolutely pissed by those clips and didn't care about whatever I could've posted in the future. Sincerely, I'm glad they left. Yeah, the higher number was cool, but I don't mind losing people that don't care about what I post. I think the most valuable ones are those who are subscribed to my posts not because I write about lenses and have pretty pictures of that, but because they like the whole package of what I represent. That one day I'll have something with visual effects in it, another day might be a lens review, or something I was happy about doing (like hanging out with May), and that kind of thing. And now we're back at the title, which finally makes sense.

I am a content creator, yes. But more than that, I'm a person with ups and downs. I do some cool stuff but I do shitty stuff twice as much. Not everyday of my life has an amazing discovery or a breakthrough technique. If someone doesn't wanna hire me because of that, I'm fine with it, I'm fine to the point of writing this post trying to encourage you to think the same way. And with that cheesy last sentence, I'm signing out for today.

Watching a good movie in bad company will never come close to be as entertaining as watching a bad movie in good company. That being said, avoid "We Are Your Friends", save your money for something better (which is easy)!

Every once in a while I write or say that my life seems to be a loop and never elaborate on that. Let's try that for today, and let me be specific about my creative process.

The loop usually goes like this. It starts with an awful boring lack of will to start working on something new. This is what I'm starting to define as the "absorption stage". I usually watch a ton of movies, series, read like a maniac, good and bad things, there's not much judgement about what I'm ingesting. Some bits of this overload of information are picked from their original source - a specific shot, a camera move, a particular vfx, the way a sequence sounds, the visual style of a game, the plot that interconnects multiple characters in different situations, that kind of thing. Every once in a while I come across a piece of entertainment which I can't seem to make up my mind whether I liked it or not, so it sticks to the brain and I can't think about anything else BUT that movie/game/book/song. These are the best ones. It happened with Nightcrawler, Life Is Strange and at least one or two songs every week. These ones are stored in a special place, and will very likely be used as master references for a particular project.

At this stage I feel like I can't come up with anything new or original. Later on, all those small selections and master references will be mashed together and recombined somehow. This is the tricky part, when I have several ideas which I like. I have to write them down so they don't vanish completely. Some seem doable, some sound more like dreams. I say it's tricky for a few reasons. Number One: I don't feel like I can start developing them all, which leads to number Two: which one is the most doable with what I have and what I know? Most of the times I can't focus or start any specific idea so there's a constant feeling that, at any moment, a brilliant plan will show up, which never does and the loop restarts.

When I'm more grounded I have the clarity to sit down and take a look at the possibilities. It's always a matter of practice. If I give in, I'll end up doing nothing. After one idea is picked, there's still some mental wrestling while the other ones try their best to be convincing and doable and I have to keep it under control. Then the real hard part starts, when I have to bring it into reality and deal with all of its limitations. Sometimes this completely defeats the purpose of the idea, and the loop restarts.

If not, if it still seems doable, comes the part of going out and doing it. Shooting, or animating, or drawing, or whatever, something practical. And then it's never how I expect it to be so there is some more time to fine tune it. There's also the danger of everything that I thought would be hard simply worked out perfectly. This is dangerous because it puts the plan in a pedestal and I feel afraid of pushing forward and discovering flaws or hitting unexpected problems. When this happens - before the flaws and problems - it's usually late at night and I'm working on my own. Something unpredictable comes out perfectly, or someone gives me a very positive reply, or the universe simply converges onto making that work, and that drives me into a state of super excitement in which I can't stand still. This is when life seems to be absolutely perfect and everything means something, and that something is good. When it happens, I can't keep working and have to go out for a walk, or bike ride in amazement. Yeah, it's very self-centric, I know. This is also another trap to restart the loop.

There are at least a few times along the process when everything seems to be going right. These always act like pitfalls and I have to stay alert whenever it happens, clearing my head and getting back to work quickly.

WHEN I eventually get to the end and avoided restarting the loop midway through the process, I get to the results. Sometimes the entire process takes less than a day (like the Little Talks project), sometimes a few months (Zona SSP), and once in a while, almost an entire year, such as Hovering Lights. Finishing something, for me, is MUCH MUCH harder than starting, and that's why I tend to make the start so rough. I feel bad for any project I drop along the way, I know I learned with it, but it didn't get to where I wanted to go. So, if I'm very careful with what I start, I make sure that I'm going all the way with it. Of course, this also leads to the risk of never starting anything, but lately I've been having so many new ideas that at least a few of them have to be worthy of some time. Time is pretty much all I have now! So, after the cycle is completed, it restarts.

It has got to a point that I know what's going on when I start to just watch too much TV or play for too long, so I start going through the ideas to get to the next stage and not get stuck enjoying other people's work but having none of my own.

Here's a little story about adapting my work to fit the rules.

About ten months ago I started to develop my demo reel, Hovering Lights. It started out as a found footage project, much like Cloverfield, Chronicle and such. Following that line, my original plan was to shoot it all 16:9, like a handycam and have all the overlays on the screen, which would be another thing I wanted to learn how to script. In the first presentation people said it was too outdated, looking like something from the 90s. At some point one of the instructors suggested that I made it all look like it was shot with a phone, and uploaded to Instagram. That idea clicked pretty well with my crazy-experimenting side and I decided to set that as a goal.

First things first, I needed to figure out Instagram's limitations. Maximum length: 15 seconds. Video dimensions 640x640 px, square format, 29,97fps. So even my longest shots needed to fit in 15 seconds or less. That kind of solved the problem I was having trying to figure a way to make it all look continuous while hiding several cuts along the way. Getting adjusted to the square aspect ratio was the hardest part, and I started my Instagram account two or three days after that presentation. I posted daily: old photos, new photos, some assignments, tests and whatnot, building up my audience in the months before the reel was ready to go.

Of course, I shot it with the 5D3, raw, and got me some extra resolution to finish the project at 1080p Square - no way in hell I was going to have my final output down to 640 Square! - cropping information on the sides and adjusting my framing along the each shot by manually moving the crop around the original shots. It turned out nice, dynamic and still holding LOTS of information for post. Then I went forward working on the shots through the remainder of my program. In term 6 I hit a speedbump and went back home for a while, getting back to work on my final shot with class 3D112, kind of restarting my Term 6.

Following a schedule different from my original class, 3D112's graduation won't happen until September 18th, which should be the time I'd have the final sound for my project - there has been some more interesting developments on this part, though - so I had to wait before officially releasing it on Instagram. At some point I decided "you know what, fuck that, no matter how amazing this sound will be, it won't be noticeable on a phone's speakers", so I started posting the first part last Sunday (August 23rd).

Second part went online on the 28th...

And then, coolest thing ever - not to say otherwise -, on the 29th, Instagram decided "ehhh, fuck this square aspect ratio thing, you know?" and removed restrictions so anyone can post whatever pictures and videos taller or wider than the original 640px resolution. Boom, that was it. What's the point of having square footage now? My single salvation is the fact that this is too recent and the majority of users is still posting square stuff. So today I uploaded the rest of the project - even more luckily, everything that was left to be uploaded should happen in a single straight sequence of posts, unlike the two first parts - and watched my followers count drop by EIGHT people not ten minutes after I was done. Seriously? But, ok, I'm fine with that. I already got seven new ones to fill in that hole.

I got lucky that the whole thing was already going on, but if that change regarding the aspect ratio had happened in the middle of my development process, man, I'd be pissed for weeks. What did I learn from this experience? If I ever adapt my work to fit something else's rules, I better release it faster than 10 months, right? Hahaha!

This post links up with something else, but it's an entirely different subject, so I'll just stop here. Enjoy all the clips, and follow me, if you still don't!

The Isco 16:9 Video Attachment is almost identical to an Iscorama 54, with a different stretch factor. It's super hard to find and yields excellent results with razor sharp images. Special thanks to the amazing Gabi Akashi for helping me with the world tests!

USEFUL LINKS:

• Look for an Isco-Optic Video Attachment on eBay
• Look for an Iscorama on eBay
• Download the full resolution sharpness tests
• Watch the Iscorama 54 review

All the RED links on this post are part of eBay's Partner Network, so if you purchase anything through them, you're helping me to keep this project going.

You can support this project on Patreon. Make your contribution and help the Anamorphic Cookbook!

Yeah, it's true, I suffer from the Too Close Until It's Too Far syndrome, an uncommon photographic condition regarding longer focal lengths. While you're testing the lens on your own, at home, it seems to bring everything up close but as soon as you go out to the world you realize people are too small and far away in your framing.

If I had to choose between shooting with a 20mm or a 200mm for my entire life, I'd pick the 200mm in a heartbeat. I LOVE telephoto lenses. That relates to a few things in my shooting style that I'm still working on, such as "I'm never comfortable taking pictures of random people", I tend to think they noticed me and will be pissed about being on camera. Add on top of that the fact that I like observing the world from a distance, without being a part of what goes on around me regarding people I don't know (like when I'm biking on my own, taking the bus or walking around town). This strengthens my bond with longer lenses.

I've always wanted a 300mm. The second lens I ever owned was Canon's 75-300mm, the cheapest modern telephoto zoom around, I think. It had terrible image quality, no stabilization, it was way too dark (f/4-5.6) and it was SUPER FUN to shoot with. That was the moment I started to fall for these huge things. Afterwards I had the incredible 70-200mm f/2.8L IS Mk II, which I ended up selling when moving to Canada, not because I didn't like it anymore, but because the money was more useful at that moment. And then I played low for shortly over a year, with my longest lens being the Tair 11A, which is 135mm. Then came the Contax Zeiss 135mm which is an absolute killer, and not long after that my long-awaited Tair 3 (300mm f/4.5) arrived in the mail.

I can literally spy the people living in the building across the street if I wanted to. This lens is humongous and every bit as amazing. When I started testing it out at home, I felt it was super long and that I could finally snap those nice golden hour decisive moments of random strangers just stopping my bike for a few seconds. Then I took it out for a ride and my syndrome came into play. Everything and everyone seemed super-far-away, small in the frame and not helping me with good compositions at all. I kept it cool and snapped some pictures of strangers anyway for the Tales of the Seawall series. Focusing is fun (I'm being sarcastic, the lens has marks for 100m before infinity plus the focus ring has almost 360 degrees of throw) and the setup can get quite heavy after a while if not handled properly, so I decided it is time to practice shooting through the viewfinder again, instead of relying so much on the LCD screen and digital magnification.

I took it out a few other times since that first day and it's growing on me. I started to chase birds again and will soon start doing the same thing to people. I mean, if the birds won't fly away, why the hell would a person 60+ feet away notice me? Besides, I can always crop in, if my resolution is high enough. For example, I was around 100ft away from the couple in the picture below. Turned out nice, right?

I'll eventually be good enough to focus a seagull on the fly (pun intended), or maybe go into parks and use camouflage until my subjects come close enough!